i am sick of sleeping alone
praying for someone to fill the space between the sheets and sunrise.
i am sick of hearing “in due time” or
“the right person is out there!”
where? where the fuck are you?
did you fall down, get lost, forget about me?
i am aching to be your wife, for “honey im home”
for arguments about the kids and make up sex
for dinner dates and sunday morning snuggles
im scared it will never happen
i am not desperate
i am without my pair.
**this video is my favorite from childhood – its how i picture myself telling God what my heart desires [like his doesn’t already know, lol]
Tanner has been asking about a husband, telling me his wish list for this person (cute, eh?) so here’s mine:
- must be hot! not talking cute, good looking, nice – I want hot! I have wasted too much time on acceptable.
- by hot: tall-er 5’11 – 6’3, well groomed, hair, light or really dark eyes, baby soft skin, no unibrow, eyelashes longer than mine, own a pair of nose trimmers and use them, ears (sounds simple but you never know), no hair issues on chest stomach or back, does not need to look like a body builder but I do appreciate a nice physique, a a** would be fun but not too much, no kankles, nice feet.
- Knows how to dress – I dig peacoats, turtlenecks, trousers, shoes that do not have letter or animals or characters on them, boxer or boxer briefs, no excessive chains medallions rings or earrings, piercing are ok if well done.
- THE MAJOR STUFF
- COMES HOME TO ME
- LOVES GOD WITH ALL HIS LIFE
- likes dogs cats and enjoys spending time around my animals (i have a sphinx)
- likes to travel to new places and explore them
- will travel with WITH me
- not afraid to try new food places things ideas
- is smart i mean really smart in a backward not so noticeable way (like the brains of dickinson, dorothy parker, southpark creators, Steve jobs, Mike Rowe, lil wayne [seriously read his lyrics – they are genius])
- LOVES MY KIDS AND WANTS TO MAKE BABIES
- BRITISH ACCENTS ARE BONUS
- loves to watch movies (i like bollywood a lot)
- likes to talk on walks
- loves to go driving
- take me out – alot
- like to have people over to play games like Cranium and cards
- Like to travel with other families
- thinks prostitution, porn, cheating on ones partner, lying and deception are negative to a growing relationship
- LIKES MY FRIENDS
- likes snow, skiing and mountains
- does not hold it against me that i do not dig yardwork
- loves to grow things like veggies
- thinks organic is the only way to go
- understands that i could have a orgasm everytime i go to wholefoods – its that wonderful! and does not think that is weird.
- loves that i share my secrets with him and that he shares his with me.
- TAKES MY BOYS TO GAMES, PARK, RIDE BIKES, FISHING, CAMPING, TO GET DIRTY AND DIG IN THE DIRT – all the things they missed out on.
- knows that i am a little quirky – but loves it!
- is proud of me
- thinks im beautiful even with pjs and tears
- loves to dress me up and show me off
- understands that i think outloud and loves to here me talk
- know im an idea person and loves it
- loves that i dream
- lets me love him
- lets me take care of him
- lets me stay home and raise our family even though he knows i could be doing something amazing at the office
- doesn’t get mad when i forget stuff or fall asleep during the movie
- reads to the boys
- leads the boys in Christ
- prays with and for us and our family
- doesn’t mind coming home to mess sometimes
- is my friend, lover, and knows when to be them and when to let me be his
- knows my 5 loves languages and let me know his
- is my knight in shinning armour
- lets me be me
- laughs at me when i make dinner and it burns because i had to share with him the news of the day
- loves that i run to him
- is open to me loving him in the quirky ways i do
- loves the notes i leave on his car and in his breifcase and on his phone
- loves that i surprise him with things
- loves that i am a lady but a freak in bed
- loves that i love him
- loves that we have blessings
- understands that money and things are not as important as family and life
- HE NEVER RAISES HIS VOICE TO ME OR THE KIDS
- WOULD NEVER HIT OR ABUSE ME OR THE KIDS
- WOULD NEVER BRING SOMETHING INTO OUR LIVES THAT WOULD HURT US
- is strong
- knows how to fix stuff bc i sure dont
- he knows how to laugh at life
- has tattoos not bc its cool but bc they mean something to him
- is an artist
- has a job
- has a career
- loves that i grew up the way i did
- knows me inside and out
- not sure if i could do *secret* that…. i trust you God.
- IS A MAC
- or if he is a pc is willing to convert.
- knows the 2 BIG SECRETS about me and does not care but supports me in the struggle.
- LOVES GOD MORE THAN ME – and knows i do too!
ok so this is it! if you fit the bill – APPLY!